


Empty Room

by Ashoul



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-02
Updated: 2021-02-02
Packaged: 2021-03-13 01:53:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,973
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29145486
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ashoul/pseuds/Ashoul
Summary: ⚠season four spoilers⚠Mikasa suffers the loss of losing her soon to be wife Sashaduring the attack on Marley.
Relationships: Mikasa Ackerman/Sasha Blouse
Comments: 7
Kudos: 100





	Empty Room

... 

The sunset over from just behind the walls casting a red glow over the land. Mikasa slid off the platform of the airship and onto the soft grass. The dark haired girl turned around and offered her hand to Armin who was still standing on the airship. Mikasa looked at where his eyes were locked on and frowned. 

“Armin.” she called to him. He slowly turned his head to look at her, his ocean blue eyes were red and puffy from crying. She stretched out her hand to him. Armin took her hand and let her help him out of the airship. Jean and Connie were a little off to the side watching as Hange and Levi carried a stretcher with their fallen friend on it. Mikasa’s breath hitched as she saw Sasha’s lifeless face. Her pretty eyes were shut and her russet colored hair was messily sticking out in all directions.

Mikasa bit her lip and looked at the ground to stop herself from crying again.  _ Why wasn’t I there to protect her…? Why couldn’t I save her…? Why couldn’t I-  _ Mikasa was snapped from her destructive thoughts by a hand on her shoulder causing her to look up. Armin was looking at her with a look that could only be described as heartbreak. His face was contorted in a painful frown and tears slid down his cheek. 

“A-Armin-” she started but no words came out. Mikasa’s body moved on it’s own, wrapping her arms around the shaking blonde. Armin sobbed into her shoulder.

“I’m sorry… I know this is probably hitting Jean and Connie a whole lot more than me. I’m sorry.” Armin sniffed in between sobs. Mikasa’s eyes widened as her hand made its way into her friend’s hair, gently stroking his head. Mikasa held onto Armin and tried to calm him.

“She was your friend too, Armin. You don’t need a better reason to be upset other than that.” Another pair of arms were wrapped around her as she recognized Jean’s voice, “I’m sorry, Mikasa.” Connie had also joined them coming up behind Armin and joining in on the comforting of the blond boy. Minutes passed and they just stayed there together until Levi’s voice sounded from infront of them. 

“Come on, brats. We need to have her burial.”. Jean and Connie broke away from Armin and Mikasa to follow their captain. Armin remained standing there, his eyes more puffy and swollen than before. Mikasa once again grabbed his hand, “Let’s go, Armin.” He just nodded and followed her silently. 

…

After Sasha’s family and friends had finished speaking it was the dreaded time to say goodbye. Mikasa watched Sasha’s family take turns saying goodbye before Connie and Jean walked forward. Mikasa could not hear what they were saying but both were shaking as Connie reached out to touch her face one final time before following Jean back to stand with everyone else. Mikasa walked forward alone. It felt as though hours were passing as she took her steps towards Sasha’s casket. What felt like hours was but only seconds as she found herself standing beside Sasha’s body. 

Mikasa immediately felt tears pour down her cheeks as she reached a shaky hand to touch her fallen friend. Mikasa's soft fingers brushed the hair from Sasha’s eyes to show her face. She looked… peaceful. Mikasa choked out a sob as she leaned over pressing her forehead to Sasha’s. Memories fogged her brain as she held onto her dead friend. 

…

The night was cold and there wasn’t much warmth to go around for everyone. Mikasa clung to her blanket like it was the only thing left for her. She looked over at the pretty girl across from her bunk. Sasha was left without a blanket because like the stupidly nice person she was she gave it to Mina who was left without a blanket during the war that took place in the barracks for a blanket. 

Mikasa and Annie were the only two guaranteed a blanket as nobody dared take it from them. Sasha sneezed and tried pulling her night shirt further down to cover her legs. Mikasa sighed and rolled off her bed and walked to stand beside Sasha’s bed. Sasha looked up at her, “You okay, Mikasa?” 

“Scoot over.” Sasha did what Mikasa told her to do and the dark haired cadet crawled into Sasha’s bed. She threw the blanket over both of them then rolled onto her side to face the opposite direction. Silence filled the room as Sasha’s brain finished short circuiting. Mikasa could practically hear the smile on the russet haired girl’s face. Suddenly, she felt arms wrap around her waist and a forehead pressed against her back. 

“Oi, Sasha!” Mikasa flinched at the sudden contact but did not try to get away. Sasha nuzzled her face into her back and smiled softly, “You really are a nice person, Mikasa. Nothing like how I thought you were. Honestly I thought you were a scary son of a bitch but you’re not.” Mikasa wrinkled her nose, “Was that a compliment?” Sasha giggled, “Yes’m.” Mikasa probably didn’t even need the blanket at this point, her body was burning in embarrassment. Mikasa eventually relaxed into Sasha’s arms and even interlocked her hand with Sasha’s holding it against her chest.

Eventually, both girls fell asleep and upon waking they were surrounded by all the girls. Their eyes wide as Sasha clung to Mikasa, sleepily. Even Annie was watching as the girls held onto one another. The girls scattered as Mikasa’s dark eyes narrowed making a run for it before Mikasa definitely killed them. Mikasa attempted to sit up but Sasha pulled her back down. This time their faces were centimeters apart.

Sasha was still half asleep as she pulled Mikasa close to her wrapping both arms and legs around her. Mikasa, now in the cage known as Sasha’s death grip, very well could not move a muscle. Mikasa sighed and relaxed once again into Sasha’s embrace. 

“Hey, Annie. Tell Instructor Shadis that I’m not feeling well and Sasha is taking care of me.” Mikasa called out to the blonde girl across the room who was still changing clothes. Annie sighed, “Fine. What do I get in return?” Mikasa grumbled, “I don’t fucking know, I’ll give you part of my lunch.” Annie hummed, “Hmm. Fine.”. 

Mikasa looked down at the girl who held onto her and could not hold back a smile. Annie called out from behind Sasha, “Woah, you can smile?” Mikasa made an effort to not wake Sasha but still made it clear she would get up and smack the shit out of the short blonde. 

After Annie left and the two girls were alone Sasha opened her eyes, “Boo.” Mikasa looked at her with narrowed eyes, “I’m skipping training for this cuddle session. Go back to sleep.” Sasha giggled, “Wasn’t asleep.” Mikasa grumbled and pulled Sasha closer to her, “You’re an ass. Don’t waste my time, idiot.” Sasha giggled again which made Mikasa’s heart flutter, “Don’t laugh, I might fall in love with you.” Sasha smirked, “Too late, I fell in love with you the first day of training about a year ago.” 

Mikasa sighed, “I guess it cannot be helped then.” She pressed her lips to Sasha’s forehead giving her a soft peck, “Now sleep.”

…

Tears poured down Mikasa’s face, “Don’t sleep. Please wake up.” She kept closing her eyes and shaking her head then opening them again hoping that eventually they’d be back on the airship together on their way home after a successful victory. But no matter how much Mikasa hoped and prayed for Sasha to wake up she never would. Never again would Mikasa see her soft brown eyes or hear the laugh that made her fall in love with the other girl.

Mikasa’s eyes clouded with tears as she placed a final kiss to her forehead, “I love you, Sasha.”.

…

The night was silent as Mikasa walked beside Armin towards their rooms. They arrived at Mikasa’s room first. “Eren’s in the cell under the courthouse for tonight so we are both alone tonight.” Armin said.  _ That's right. I’m… alone.  _ Mikasa’s shoulders drooped as the realization sunk in. She placed a hand on the knob to her door and waved to Armin who still stood behind her, “Yeah. Goodnight, Armin.” She didn’t wait for his response as she slipped into her room.

She stared at the room. It was exactly the same as it was when they left. Mikasa clumsily hobbled to her bed and sat down, “Was this room always so big?” She said softly. Mikasa sighed and collapsed onto her back and stared at the ceiling. The silence was so loud it killed her. She glanced over at Sasha’s empty bed, the blankets and pillows still a mess as the girl never would make her bed in the morning. 

…

“Say, Sasha. Would you ever consider getting married?” Mikasa asked as she pulled her shirt off over her head and laid it neatly onto her bed. Sasha quickly covered her face so as to not see Mikasa’s shirtless body. Mikasa sighed, “Sasha, you’ve seen me shirtless hundreds of times and you still flustered.” Sasha whined, “Yeah, I know that! I’m just being a decent human being!” 

Mikasa laughed, “Where the hell was this decency during dinner last night? You literally took two plates of food and stole my bread.” Sasha purred, “I was hungry!” Mikasa rolled her eyes and continued to put her uniform on, “You’re always hungry. Anyways, answer my question.” Sasha had begun to get dressed as well, “Wait what did you ask again?”

“Marriage, Sasha.” Sasha closed her eyes and nodded, “Yes, marriage. Marriage… Wait! Marriage? Like married? Me and you? Now?” Mikasa rolled her gray eyes, “Hmm… After the mission. When we get home, Sasha, will you marry me?” Sasha’s chocolate brown eyes widened at Mikasa’s request. She dropped her boots and flung herself onto the taller girl hugging her tightly, “Yes! I’d definitely marry you!” 

Mikasa smiled and held the girl in her arms, “I love you, Sasha. So please come home safely” Sasha didn't move but instead held her tighter, “I love you too, Mikasa. I promise, I will come home and we can get married.”

…

Tears poured once again down Mikasa’s face, “She… didn’t come home…she-” Mikasa choked on her sobs, “She didn’t come home.” Mikasa found herself crawling weakly out of her bed and stumbling like a drunk to the door. She opened it and walked through the hallway. 

_ I don’t want to be alone. I can’t be alone.  _ Mikasa arrived at Armin’s room and without knocking she stumbled in to find Armin curled up on his bed. He looked up, “Mikasa? Hey, Mikasa, what’s wrong. Come here.” Armin called to the shaking girl in his doorway. 

Mikasa let out a pained whimper before making her way to Armin’s bed. She climbed in beside him and held onto him, “I don’t want to be alone, Armin, please let me stay here.” Armin’s finger ran through Mikasa’s short, black hair and he hummed softly, “It’s going to be okay, Mikasa. She’s not gone entirely. Sasha is watching over you. I promise she’s not gone. You really think she’d leave you completely?” He let out a soft yet drained laugh, “It’s okay. It’s going to be okay.” 

Hours into the night Armin was still awake running his fingers through her hair and rubbing circles into Mikasa’s back in an attempt to get her to sleep. Eventually it worked as the girl had finally exhausted herself into sleep. Armin sighed heavily and held onto his best friend, “Man, Sasha… you left me with quite the mess to fix. It’s okay though, I’ll take care of her for you. You don’t have to worry. You can rest now, Sasha”.

**Author's Note:**

> If you don't like the ship don't read 🥰


End file.
